grey world.

Society has tried extremely hard to recognize there are mental health concerns by creating commercials and highlighting mental illness on even tv shows/movies. FINALLY, most of us feel like we have a voice and we can open up about what is going on. That initial feeling of relief slowly seeps through our lips as we bounce back into this routine of “I am fine… Really”… The step we need to take and push ourselves to take, is the step to work through what we find troubling. Simple roadblock, we feel by going to speak to someone or seek any sort of help is “rock bottom” or a “last resort”. Things don’t have to be that bad before you recognize the need for help and accepting that need. As society is trying to push for the acknowledgement of mental illness, they coincidentally push people further into the “closet”. What most of us need more than the 1-800 line, is a hand to reach out too. We are all starting to realize that we are all not okay but we are okay because we have to be. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that either. Our world can be so confusing and as the government and institutions try to simplify right/wrong, left/right and sane/insane, we become lost within ourselves. This world is grey and it is ourselves who have the choice to color it as we see fit.

The struggle can be extremely real. The voice we once heard that pushed us to leap through the wild grass fields to staying up late to watch the stars twinkle knowing you will be exhausted in the morning. That little piece of each of us is very vital to reconnect too. I kept feeling like I am missing something or need something, yet I never would sit still to figure it out. Also felt like I needed to be told how to get that back or simple what I needed to do. I was so wrong. My world moves so quickly and all I needed to do was stop and listen. That little voice came back and gave me the drive to start writing. The help each of us need isn’t always 20 hours of therapy or taking a trip to Thailand. Some times we just need to stop and really listen. That little voice will come back.

A phrase I always love hearing is, “it’s okay to not be okay”. We need to remind ourselves of this. We get clouded by society pushing us for help or speaking out loud yet you begin feeling ashamed to seek that help. We begin masking the world around us to fit what will make us feel “better” or more “normal”. How fair is that? When I sense this type of shelter, I will literally begin having terrible dreams or anxiety will creep within my body as I feel the earthquake that will erupt for this person. Why should we put icing on a cake we don’t like when we don’t really enjoy it? I get so bloody frustrated with this type of person when I see them pretending. We should never have to fear tomorrow. That hand I spoke of above is so important. If you don’t feel you have a hand to reach out to, do a quick reshuffle until you find one you can hold tightly too. We have ONE life. Enjoy the icing, and don’t be afraid of the norm. We all got this together.